How to make the perfect hard boiled eggs
Posted: October 2, 2015 Filed under: The Diary of a Dork | Tags: cooking, cooking with the dork Leave a comment »Step 1: Put two eggs in a pot, fill with cold water so that both eggs are covered. Add salt, because someone on the internet told you to.
Step 2: Place pot on burner, turn burner on, bring to a boil.
Step 3: Remove from burner immediately, let sit for five minutes in an attempt to have a soft-boiled egg.
Step 4: Take eggs out, cool in cold water, crack open, get egg everywhere, they’re not done, throw it all away. Try again.
A few days later…
A: Same as Step 1.
B: Put on burner, and plan follow instructions better this time which are: bring to a boil, simmer for one minute, remove from burner, and then let sit in hot water for 12 minutes.
C: After eggs simmer for a minute, remove from heat, cover, and forget about them.
D: 25-ish minutes later remember that you were doing something in the kitchen and panic that they’ll be overcooked, pour out hot water and try to cool down.
E: Eggs are fine. Slightly green but no worse for the wear. Congrats.
The following week…
i: Decide to replicate A-E, since it worked. Put more eggs in pot this time, fill with water, put on burner.
ii: Larger amount of water takes so long to boil that you forget about it while checking the news (then facebook, then 3 articles and a video later…)
iii: Come back undetermined amount of time later (10-15ish minutes? No clue) to well-boiling water (how long has it been boiling? who knows?), burn hand trying to bring pot to sink to pour out hot water, fill with cold water.
iv: Crack an egg to test it. Expect either egg yolk to come pouring out or for the egg to be waaay overdone.
v: Egg is literally perfect. Good luck replicating that.
I’m good at cooking.